Thursday, 31 December 2009

Jim Jones talks gambling

Last year we brought you the gospel according to Jim Jones on the vagaries of fashion, this year we're closing '09 with Jim's pearls of wisdom on the compulsiveness of knowing when to hold 'em and knowing when to fold 'em :

"A man got to make at least one bet a day or he could walk around lucky all day and not even know it"



Bonus Dipset beats :

This really should've been on Diplomatic Immunity volume 1 instead of one of the cringeworthy skits where they let the excitable Freaky Zeeky lose in front of a microphone :

Jim Jones - Questions



Which reminds me, that recent Hell Rell Live From Hell album thingy has some jams on it. Most notably this :

Hell Rell - Motion Pictures



The Blaxploitation horns and staccato drums prevelent on pretty much every Dipset affiliated song from 2004 - 2005 are a-okay in my book, the rehashed Jada punchline about using albums by his enemies as ashtrays in 2009, on the other hand, gets the facepalm. Still, he just about makes up for it with the line where he goes "Rosa Parks sat on the back of the bus, just so I could sit in the front of this drop". Fight the power, doggy.

Happy new years and all that bollocks.

Tuesday, 29 December 2009

Robe-o-copped

A couple of months back when winter was first beginning to take its strangehold on us, I was pondering dressing gowns. On paper, there's a certain suave comfortability in coming home on a harsh winter evening and slipping in a nice dressing gown after a hot bath, but the reality isn't quite so straightfoward if my previous two dalliances with dressing gowns are anything to go by.

That swanky silk dressing gown I copped was just too thin and I ended up ripping it after catching the pocket on a door handle rushing to answer the phone, and the thick cotton effort I replaced it with was too heavy and felt a little too....how best to describe it? A little too Karen Mathews.

I'd consigned the dressing gown to the Nice In Theory, But... section of my brain until a recent hook up of the episode of WCW : Nitro where Curt "Mr Perfect" Hennig came out to join the n.W.o resplendent in Ric Flair's Nature Boy robe in Flair's hometown of Charlotte, North Carolina after turning heel on Flair and The Four Horsemen the previous evening at Fall Brawl by slamming the door of the steel cage on his noggin' inspired an eBay assisted epiphany which led me to this :



Not too thin, not too heavy and that awful feeling of being a male Karen Matthews should be nullified by the flamboyance of being a rootin' tootin' Nature Boy every time you slip it on - perfect. I 'unno, though. Maybe I'm just being a stingy cynical twat but for $299 and $20 p+p i expect something with a little more swag. Something like this :



Or this :



Or this :



You smell me, mayn? Something that makes you feel like the ultimate space mountain dwelling, limousine ridin', jet flyin', kiss stealin', wheelin' dealin' son of a gun.



There are innumerable rap rumours which amuse me, particularly the one about Freddie Foxxx threatening to bumrape various Landspeed Records staff with a baseball bat for non-payment of royalties and the recent salacious one about Cage's latest confused emo-mess of an album possibly bankrupting Def Jux to the tune of 200 grand, but my personal favourite rap rumour ever has to be the one about Kool Keith coming out on stage in a silver mullet wig, a Nature Boy robe and a fake nose on Ultramagnetic's tour of The Four Horsemen LP. Whether it's true or not doesn't really matter, as it's all about the mental images it conjures up.

Sunday, 27 December 2009

Bloggin' in my old school



Thanks to Discogs.com for alerting me to Little Bruce's XXXtra Mannish album a while back when searching for tunes that Mike Mosley had produced and/or pre-1995 releases on E-40's Sick Wid' It Records imprint, and thanks to my pal for procuring me a copy of Bruce's Mobbin' In My Old School 12" for Xmas, 'cause this is a much better present than that PS2 add-on thingymebob you bought me for Xmas in 2004 that I never used because I only bought a PS2 to play GTA : San Andreas.

Little Bruce - Mobbin' In My Old School





You can never have too many uses of Funky Worm, can you? Especially if it's used alongside Joe Tex and Isaac Hayes samples first used by NWA and Compton's Most Wanted.

Anyway, from 6 In The Mornin' by Ice-T, Boyz In The Hood by Eazy E, and Act A Fool by King Tee in the late 80s, to Steady Mobbin by Ice Cube, Let Me Ride by Dre and Gin And Juice by Snoop in the early 90s, many of the best west coast gang$ta-rap singles have been day-in-the-life narratives which seemed to be conceived primarily for video treatment, and this tradition was continued with the likes of California Livin' remix by Mac Dre & Coolio (a different Coolio, but let's play a game of taking sides : achieving legend status after getting shot dead in Kansas Vs. sharing a house with washed up UK celebs where you get to grope Ulrika Johnson and her with the funny name who used to be in the Sugababes), 4 Deep by C-Bo, Hot Sunny Day by Celly Cel and Bruce's Mobbin' In My Old School from '93 - '95. If you live in a drab sexless country like the UK where mediocrity is celebrated, and where the long winters are colder than Horace Pinker's soul and the summers are usually a couple of days of sunshine sporadically placed inbetween weeks of drizzle then seeing videos of cadillac driving 18 year olds frollicing with scantily clad honeys in the pools of their backgardens seemed exotic, and if the glamourous future predicted in the ABC, Duran Duran and Prince videos of the 80s weren't going to arrive just yet, these seemed like a pretty good stop-gap.

Such videos were also great sources for sartorial inspiration as early 90s west coast gang$ta-rap was the greatest era of rap fashion, but, eh, Bruce doesn't quite have the physique for a wifebeater, his alternating between having his pants pulled up to Pete Rock on the cover of Mecca And The Soul Brother levels one minute, and then emo-kid hanging below his ass cheeks levels the next isn't really working, his hairdoo is reminiscent of the ghost who lives in the public toilet in series 2 of Round The Twist, and WTF is the tucking of his pants into his socks like some British raver circa 1991/1992 all about?

Still, Bruce makes up for any clothing faux pas in the Mobbin' In My Old School video with his Footlocka Crew track on the XXXtra Mannish album (handily on the B. side of the Mobbin'.. 12"), as it's like Cube's A Gangsta's Fairytale and GZA's Labels gave birth :

Little Bruce - Footlocka Crew



See, I told y'all rappers from the Bay make the best tunes about gear. If only he'd have known that in 2009 Footlocker would be the dumping ground for every generic Air Force or Air Max, and the only place on the planet you can guarantee to hear the entire catalogue of Akon anytime you happen to visit.

Finally, I suppose we should end with the best song on XXXtra Mannish, Fuck Little Bruce, which features fires shots at Mac Dre, and which was the song responsible for starting the whole 90s beef between E-40's neighbourhood and Mac Dre's neighbourhood. Now this is some twitchy, Seinfeld theme bassed, Bay G-Funk shit :

Little Bruce - Fuck Little Bruce

Saturday, 26 December 2009

Greatest movie scenes ever # 24

Colour the festive period officially over, as we're declaring the next few days the heads-must-roll season after hearing news that our hombre Sha Deezy had his car broken into the other night, which resulted in his iPod, Xmas groceries and gloves gettin' jacked. Such lovely gloves too.

Harry Brown had its heart in the right place and was worth the price of admission alone to see the acoustic-guitar wielding, ol' Pam Ayres soundin' ass shit UK rapper Plan B gettin' his cap peeled (chalk off another one of our fantasies as being fulfilled), but if you're gonna indulge in a spot of vigilantism then we wanna see you be a little more creative with your blasting of criminals. It's not enough to just smoke 'em, you have to smoke 'em with flair like the god Charlie Mothafuckin' Bronson when he shot Larry Fishburne's Cutter character through his ghetto-blaster during the gunfight with the gang in Death Wish 2.



Anything else just comes off as softbatch in comparison.

Annihilation Time - Bl'ast! Off

Wednesday, 23 December 2009

What's beef?

Beef is when you get headbutted by an insane Filipino kid in front of your fans at Fat Beats.


Since the rap singles of the noughties have already been evaluated and chronicled it's time to document the really juicy shit and pay lip service to the the best rap message board beef between a civilian poster and a notable underground rapper which then spilled over into real life with disasterous consequences.

Right now there's a thought-bubble probably forming above your domepiece all like "Oh, this is just another post about that dude who looks like King Kube from Parker Lewis Can't Lose breaking the jaw of whatsisface from Cannibal Ox, huh?" Nah, never that, son; that's far too obvious a choice, and while it was hilarious that Vordul from Cannibal Ox wound up in a hospital bed with a wired jaw and the verbose steroid addict Will High ended up doing a stretch on Rikers Island for assault after El-P grassed him up to the NYPD, it wasn't quite the hilariously grandiose affair that was the Filipino Frank vs. Immortal Technique's beef on UGHH.com which led to Frank travelling from Florida to New York to confront Technique at a Fat Beats instore signing session in 2004.

Frank



Immortal Technique


Frank was a deeply disturbed kid who'd post graphic in-depth stories about being molested by his babysitter and flood the boards under gimmick accounts with pictures of gay porn; Immortal Technique was a shit punchline rapper with a cliched political edge who'd greet any sort of non-fawning feedback with threats of violence, racial slurs against caucasians and his habitual "I WAS BORN IN A PERUVIAN HOSPITAL, N*GGA, AND I'LL CRACK YOUR FUCKIN' DOMEPIECE OPEN IF YOU EVER COME TO HARLEM YOU MOTHERFUCKIN' PUSSY" rants; together they made sweet internet love for the doey eyes of rap message boarders.

Our story begins when the tempremental Technique was an underground rapper posting on UGHH.com to promote his releases or performances. It was your usual boring guff which the denizens of UGHH politely pretended to be interested in (at that point rap message boards were in a post-The Blueprint state of flux where former Sage Francis fans often mutated into Juelz Santana lyrics-posting Dipset fans overnight, so Technique was semi-acceptable for either camp) or would casually mock with no malice intended. Frank would troll Technique posts with pictures of the Super-Mario Brothers and taunts that Technique should float back to Cuba on his banana boat and Technique would explode in anger with expletive ridden caps-locks threats (TM. Necro) where he revealed in intimate detail what he'd do to Frank if they were to ever cross paths. This went on for weeks with Frank even registering a fake female AOL screen name to sucker the flirtatious Technique into an IM cyber-sex session before copy and pasting the full conversation to Technique's considerable embarrassment and the board's delight.

Their antics continued another week or so, before Technique announced he had a Fat Beats instore the following monday and that Frank and any other internet hataz should show up to air their grievances with him mano-a-mano. Frank responded with pictures of himself writing rhymes which he claimed would end Technique's career and posing with a shotgun which he suggested he'd use if Technique didn't apologise profusely to him in person :




He also threatened to kidnap Technique and hold him hostage in a dungeon wall-wardrobe he called GAY'S CLOSET where he claimed he'd subject Technique to rectal rape via a plunger once a day :


While Frank's taunts of what would happen were amusing, nobody thought he'd actually show up in New York since he resided hundreds of miles away in Florida. It's unsure what exactly happened at Fat Beats that day - the rumour that Frank put Technique in a Figure-4 Leglock remains uncomfirmed - but here's what's known for sure via various witnesses : Frank caught an unsuspecting Technique alone on the staircase leading up into Fat Beats, where he headbutted Technique square in the face which caused him to fall down the stairs arse over tit.

After word got back to the internet of the fracas, Technique was quick to call UGHH.com owner Adam "Quest" Walder and have all evidence of it deleted. Quest complied as he didn't want his site implicated in any legal shenanigans stemming from the situation, particularly with Frank having posted pictures of himself with firearms. This, unfortunately, is why so little documentation of their behemoth beef is left online now.

Frank soaked up the glory for a few months before retreating back to spamming the board with pictures of his flaccid penis and stories about picking up teenage hookers. Last we heard he joined the military in 2005, got sent to Iraq and then got sent back to America after being caught smoking heroin where he attempted vehicular assisted suicide before he was sectioned under the same mental heath act which saw Britney institutionalised. The last picture he posted of himself was with his mother at the airport in DC on his way to the specialist ex-military loony bin he ended up at. His head injuries from the suicide attempt are visible :


Frank, we dunno if you're playing with your own shit in a cell like Alvarez from Oz right now or even if you're still alive, but here at The Martorialist we applaud your dedication to humiliating rappers who make arses of themselves on the internet and we crown your beef with Immortal Technique the greatest rap message-boarding of the noughties. Salutations are due, kicko.

All you wanted was a Pepsi, just one Pepsi...

Suicidal Tendencies - Institutionalized

Monday, 21 December 2009

Death Fresh Crew

AKA Greatest movie scenes ever 23.5



Ram Sweeney: [praying at Heather's funeral] Jesus, God in Heaven, why'd you have to kill such hot snatch?



I know bulimia's so '87, but the more Brittany Murphy succumbed to Winehouse-Syndrome the past year or two, the more she resonated with my loins. 'S all about them pale bamboo boned chicks with eating disorders and drug addictions :



So, for the past couple of years I've had no success with my Betfair death-pool where I've predicted both Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan will cark it within 365 days of each other, but I figure if you were to combine the two you've basically got Brittany Murphy so I deserve some sort of each way payout right now. Give up the goods, yo.

Anyhoo, R.I.P to Miss Murphy as she was in a handful of good movies like Clueless, Freeway, Spun and Sin City, and was scheduled to appear in The Expendales next year. More pertinently, I think I cracked one out to her after going to see 8 Mile and it's always sad to see someone you had a late-night wank over die, innit?

Stay off the snarf and stay eatin', kidz.

Too $hort - City Of Dope



On a Heathers and Brittany related note, Dom P also pays tribute over at IchLugeBullets, a blog which is 2nd in title only to Voguing To Danzig.

Sunday, 20 December 2009

Martorial elegance # 38



The Homme-Jovi is a suburban chameleon which can spend years at a time blending into its surroundings via external tissue comprised of bootcut denim and Berghaus fleece, until the faintest quiver of blue collar guido cowboy rock rings out somewhere in the most affulent areas of New Jersey and it suddenly develops a Slippery When Wet leather exterior and a desire to transplant itself from its dwellings to Live On A Prarie where it...and that's quite enough shit puns based on Bon Jovi songs for today, thank you very much.

New Jersey is a handy cheaper place to stay when visiting NY and the setting for the joint third best HBO show ever, but it's a strange place musically as it's given us some of my least favourite artists of all time in Bon Jovi, Bruce Springsteen and Joe Budden, and some of my alltime favourites in Redman, Danzig, Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons, Poor Righteous Teachers, Rorschach, George Clinton and Lakim Shabazz. Here's 5 jams from NJ's finest :

Poor Righteous Teachers - Very First Time



Smoke 'um, star, like a Texas cigar! PRT's Rare And Unreleased disc turned out to be a disappointing collection of mostly inferior b side remixes, so thank fuck the few rare/unreleased proper songs on there were so good because I blindly shelled out £12 for it. I haven't the foggiest why this tune didn't appear on one of the later PRT albums since it's some classic conscious raggamuffin-rap which only pre-1995 KRS could do to a higher standard.

Rorschach - Pavlov's Dogs



Best opening song on a 90s hardcore release next to Vocal Test, and all you people who prefer Protestant to Remain Sedate, which Pavlov's Dogs here begins, are cuckoo.

Kool & The Gang - Let The Music Take Your Mind



Sad but true : My very first internet exploaration in the late 90s wasn't spent looking for porn or insulting foreigners in chatrooms, but inspecting the legendary pre-The-Breaks site which listed all the samples from Paul's Boutique as I was desperate to find out what the sample on the Lay It On Me section of B-Boy Bouillabaisse was. Thankfully, it wasn't some obscure 7" by Eddie Tex & The Chickenstrut Brothers which goes for $60000, but an easily findable Kool & The Gang tune which could be picked up for under £6. Result!

Redman - Gilla House Check



Redman's edition of MTV Cribs is probably his finest achievement this decade but he hasn't fallen off completely since he just about averages a one good song or guest verse per year ratio. This was his 2005 entry which actually gave me a glimmer of false hope for his Red Gone Wild shitfest until it finally emerged a couple of years later to complete indifference from even the most devoted Reggie acolytes. I really wish this one didn't have the Guy Ritchie extra doing the shit mockney impression on the intro, but better some fairly uninvasive ad-libbing than a verse by one of Redman's shit weed carrier Gilla House mates I 'spose.

Wednesday, 16 December 2009

What's a goon to a gobbling?



With the fragmented way we live our lives these days, where technology has enabled us to submerge ourselves in our interests and niche information, it's hard not to feel distanced from your fellow man when making polite chit-chat at the water cooler or on public transport, but if there's one thing Bob from the accounts department or that dude who was tryna tell me about his moped on the train last week and I can agree on it's that there is no greater feeling - other than watching Liverpool's season in utter turmoil before Xmas, obviously - than getting your schlong sucked. Luckily, rappers also agree with us, so here's the 5 best rap songs about fellatio.

Too $hort - Blowjob Betty



$hort's The Bitch Sucks Dick was the first rap song about oral stimulation to zee cock, but Blowjob Betty is his masterpiece in the realm of odes to gettin' yer johnson sucked due to the death-by-nut finale and the delightful union of trademark $hort synth funk and the Bam Bam sample. All rap songs about receiving head which came thereafter had to aspire to this level of detail and greatness.

Akinyele - Take A Lick



Put It In Your Mouth gets all the plaudits from squares, but real headz (lol headz - geddit?) know that Take A Lick is Ak's preeminent paean to the art of gettin' some brain with it's narrative game of cat-and-mouse between Ak' and his hesitant-to-suck British bird, which ends in a compromise of mutual bliss via a 69. We all gotta eat, yo, and shame on y'all for having the nerve to think all rappers are selfish, misogynistic pigs.

NWA - Just Don't Bite It



A friend and I once argued over whether this or She Swallowed It is the ultimate NWA blowjob anthem but I refuse to budge over my allegiance to Just Don't Bite It. Both are essentially Ren solo tracks about gettin' your spam javelin wetted up but Just Don't Bite It wins every time for the Eazy skits on the intro and outro, the superior beat, the fact that it doesn't feature one of Ren's lines about sticking broomsticks up butts, and its usage as backing music on much of the infamous pool party footage on the Eful4zaggin dvd. Ren informing us that he's gonna take one of his breezies to "a room, ayo, i mean a restroom/and stick my dick in her mouth like a wet broom" is evidence than NWA were just some ol' romantics at heart.

Three 6 Mafia ft. DJ Unk - I'd Rather Get Sum Head



Good ol' Three 6 and their many ballads dedicated to gettin' noshed off. Lesser blogs would've probably chosen Slob On My Knob for their Their 6 selection, but here at The Martorialist we're down with I'd Rather Get Sum Head's mantra of "I love havin' sex, but I'd rather get sum head". Like Cam'Ron opined to Westwood in that video where The Big Dog was driving Dipset and Cam's bird around London, once you get to the age of 30 a nut becomes a nut and you may as well attempt to get it in the most pleasurable way possible. A morning-glory salute (no Jim Dangle from Reno 911) also goes to Three 6's mate Project Pat and his very own superbly trenchant Sucks On Dick.

UGK - Pregnant Pussy



And, finally, the apogee of rap songs about fellatio. Camouflaged as an appraisal of sex with women who are heavily up-the-duff, infrared technology isn't needed to find the true intention behind this tenderly craftly ode to extremely risque oral sex as the "Pregnant pussy is the best you can get, fuckin' a bitch while her baby suckin' dick hook and Pimp C's first verse prove. Parental discretion iz advised indeed :

I guess you could call me a family man
'cause I care for bitch's babies every chance that I can
I don't give 'em clothes, or diapers and shit
but I like to feed their babies with my big black dick
'Cause I'ma tell you if you didn't know
you ain't did shit until you fucked a pregnant hoe
The pussy is hotter, it's got an extra kick
it feel like hot potato pie around your dick
Sometimes I swing high, sometimes I swing low
sometimes I like to fuck a pregnant bitch on my flo'
Hit it kinda hard, and beat it up bad
fuck her chest and give her cherry blisters on her ass
'Cause if she expectin', I can satisfy
and at the same time give her kid a pacifer
And I love it when I bust that ol' nut
'cause I know her baby just gon' lick it all up.


Feel free to add your own mildly racist ..and to think black American men are often criticized for their parental skills joke in here as a closer, while I make like R. Kelly on the Ignition remix and Bounce, Bounce my ass outta here.

Monday, 14 December 2009

Greatest movie scenes ever # 23

It's very rare that a sequel to or reboot of a perenial favourite lives up to the lofty expectations you have for it, but I'll be damn-diggity-damned if Bad Lieutenant : Port Of Call New Orleans hasn't surpassed my high hopes and even improved on the original movie.

The O.G Bad Lieutenant contains what's my favourite scene ever, but other than a few additional incredible moments, it's not a particularly good watch, is it? Port Of Call New Orleans retains some of the themes of the first movie, but thankfully eschews all the confusing Catholicism and vague pretense of a plot to just let Nic Cage run wild with the character. It's been a lonely existence as a fan of Cage's wide-eyed manic schtick (the Castor Troy scenes in Face/Off and the first 15 minutes of Snake Eyes remain untouchable) for the last decade, but validation has finally come a-knockin' on my door as Herzog agrees with me that the problem hasn't been Cage's overacting, but rather, he just hasn't been given the appropriate movie to fully showcase his lunatic charms in. Given carte blanche to spazz-out here he gives the performance of his career, and even manages appropriate homages to teh gawd Kinski as both Aguirre, with his wild eyes and hunch, and Nosferatu, with his oversized clothes.

And, yeah, nothing can ever top the wanking scene in the Ferrara flick, but if you can tell me with a straight face that these two scenes alone don't body the rest of the original, then you're straight up lying through your teeth like Herzog is when he claims he's never seen the Ferrara movie :





Add in incidental music which sounds like it's from series 1 of Round The Twist, rapper-turned-actor cameos from Xzibit and Chino XL (Xzibit is suprisingly good and with this one role has trumped his entire boring rap career), Cage namechecking Eazy E in front of his black accomplices whilst strung out and blackmailing narcotics possessing club chicks into sex (the police force should loop that scene and then show it in schools across the world as a recruitment initiative video), and we have what amounts to my favourite movie of the year, which is ironic since Cage is also the lead in my least favourite movie of 2009.

And, I was right about this toppling Baller Blockin' from its ivory tower as my favourite New Orleans based movie.

Bonus New Orleans beats

The best song from the Baller Blockin' soundtrack; and the last song Weezy did with Mannie in 2005, which is better than anything either of them have done since :

Turk & B.G - Uptown



Lil' Wayne - Ca$h Money N*gga

Friday, 11 December 2009

Great songs from forgotten rap albums part 11



Celly Cel - Heat 4 Yo Azz



Celly Cel is a rapper known for being one of the few Sick Wid It Records artists who wasn't a blood relative of E-40 and for once recording an awfully good song with UGK which is pretty much the ultimate car jam. Beyond that, the title track of his 1995 debut Heat 4 Yo Azz with legendary Bay production duo Mike Mosley and Sam Bostic (who did various tracks for C-Bo, 2pac and various old Sick Wid It rappers from 40 Water himself, down to the likes of Little Bruce) on the beat is also pretty special and I'd hate for you to go to your deathbed without hearing the song if you're not already familiar with it.



Dr Jeckyll & Mr Hyde - Freshest Rhymes In The World



I've managed to feature pretty much every Dr Jeckyll & Mr Hyde single on here over the past year and a bit this blog has existed, so it's high time something from their one and only 1985 LP Champagne Of Rap finds its way into this series. As a far of bizarre tangents and movie references in rap, Dr Jeckyll starting his verse by being abducted by Darth Vader and taken to a foreign planet where he meets various Star Wars characters before using some fancy phaser gun to turn Vader into a squirrel is pretty much an absurdist-rap wet dream. The trademark Jeckyll & Hyde flossin' is restored in the final verse as Mr Hyde chills on his yacht with Jack Costeau watching cable tv, but the bizarreness is kept intact with Hyde being dragged into the ocean by a talking shark who instructs him that they're going to play a game of Russian roulette.



Max Minelli - My First Verse



I've already posted about Max's Baton Rogue semi-classic as part of Lay-Lo and mentioned him in another post about Concentration Camp era Boosie, so it's about time he got his own solo entry into this series. Taken from his '03 set I'm All I Got, this is solo country-rap par excellence and it features some pretty killer usage of "___ ass n*gga" phraseology years before Hotstylz turned it into a viral sensation.



Akinyele - Problems



Akinyele & some wannabe Lil' Kim - Love My Bitch



Akinyele's Anakonda LP is one of those early noughties Koch Records albums from a previously dope nineties rapper which was key in establishing the label as a resting home for the creatively spent to put out shitty releases with some of the worst production this side of a post-Primo Jeru album. Not hatin', though, because any LP which is the soundtrack to some low-rent Ak' directed porn flick called Benny Ill (anybody actually seen it?) is a-okay with me and it did have 4 good songs. Problems is a demonstartion on how a rapper should rap-rap-rap ("'cause you got shorthands like stenography/Ak's guns go auto like biography"), while Love My Bitch is an exotic Lord Finesse produced sex jam with a particularly du'tty chorus for Ak' to drop a quick verse and then let one of the many stripper-turned-porn-actresses/condom-carrier femme rappers that appear on the LP to spit some saucy Lil' Kim styled verses he'd written for her.

Let's also take this opportunity to remind ourselves that Akinyele's collection of unreleased tunes liquidates Nas's vastyly overrated The Lost Tapes set into vagabond piss as far as albums of officially unissued material by rappers who appeared on Live At The Bar BQ go. Ak's shit has banger after banger, while Nas's shit is audio valium save for No Idea's Original.

Wednesday, 9 December 2009

Greatest movie scenes ever # 22

As someone who got tricked into seeing the first Twlight movie by a then girlfriend ("It's like a modern version of The Lost Boys, promise!"), I can fully empathize with those of you who've recently been dragged along to the 2nd Twlight installment by your missus, especially since 94% of women between the ages of 15 and 40 are currently obsessed with that shite and True Blood (which is acceptable since it has Vinny from Home & Away in it), but those 3 20-something lads minus any sort of femme accomplices we saw in the Twlight cinema queue saturday night gleefully waiting to get served need to step their bloodsucker movie game up. Y'all were a disgracefully bitchmade tripod of eunuchry.

Granted, the 2 Nosferatu flicks might be a little too in-at-the-deep-end for the the more recent lighter-in-the-loafers convert, but there's no reason why newjack vamp fans shouldn't investigate the 2 Fright Night movies asap. Fright Night is a cut above it's sequel in this instance (as opposed to a superior sequel in the Nightmare On Elm Street 3 or Sleepaway Camp 2 stylee), but today's installment of Greatest Movie Scenes Ever is taken from Fright Night 2, since it features the then stunning Julie Carmen as the hottest movie vampire you'll ever lay eyes on, Regine Dandridge, and the grossest vampire movie scene I've ever witnessed with the graphic close-up of Regine running her fang along Charlie's shaving cut. My nuts shrink up into my arse everytime I watch this one. Let 'im have it, sistah :



Can anybody confirm the rumour that the uptight broad who gets the 40 bottle emptied out over her in the Nuthin' But A G Thang video is Julie Carmen? I immediately thought it was her the first time I saw the video, and an American associate agreed with me, but there's no mention of it on IMDB and another American associate once told me the Dre video chick was some porn star. The latter seems the more likely since Julie was doing shows like Dream On and artsy Euro films by the early 90s, but I needs this one clearing up? Inquiring Minds gotta know, as Corey Haim once said in another vampire picture.

Bonus beats :

Jimmy Spicer - Adventures Of Super Rhyme



3:05 - 4:09. Without doubt the best impression of Count Dracula on a rap record to date. Amirite?

Sunday, 6 December 2009

Fuck my (head in the) car



Alerted to the new MJG EP (more rappers need to drop EP's as I can barely bring myself to trawl through downloadable 20 track mixtapes for the 6 good tracks anymore) by Dave over at Southern Hospitality, I've stumbled on what I'm offering up as thee This-Will-Sound-Fucking-Amazing-In-The-Car jam of '09.

It's unlikely that anything will ever top Pop The Trunk by Celly Cel & UGK or that intro beat to the video version of Natural Born Killaz by Dre & Cube in the hierarchy of ultimate car jams, but i'll be damned if this isn't the best attempt I've heard in a while :

MJG ft. T-Rock & Daz - Cold Hard World



But what of those songs which sounded like Maradona when you first heard them in a car, which then sounded a bit Juan Sebastián Verón when you later heard them in the cold light of day at home on your stereo or compoota? About 9 years ago I heard Suave House's 1997 sampler in someone's car, which featured 3 songs by a group called The Fedz who debuted on it and then promptly vanished from the rap game entirely thereafter. On this particular car journey their trifecta of tunes sounded like what would've happened if 1994 era Dre had formed a supergroup to produce for consisting of Scarface, Ice Cube and Kurupt, but when finally tracking a copy of it down a few months ago the only one of the 3 songs which isn't underwhelmingly shit is Death Notes, which is a good tune in a 2nd rate Face-Mob sorta way an' all but hardly one of the songs which haunted my mind all those years.

The Fedz - Death Notes



Still, at least Death Notes does just resemble a not as good version of one of the songs I heard years ago, as oppossed to something entirely different. The first time I heard All Black by Plies was a year or so back in Chek's car and we sat together bombing down the motorway in his four cornered Astra staring at the dash in wonder as it sounded like oscillating basslines made up of farts from the 12 gods of Olympus were simultaneously reverberating around the car and then enveloping us in a beautiful sulphur every 10 seconds over and over and over again as Zeus himself intoned the secrets of the universe.

Plies - All Black



Heard back at my house about 6 hours later, however, it just sounded like a passablely generic rapper from Miami over an 808.

Tuesday, 1 December 2009

The best rap singles of the noughties ('99 - '09)



A few of you may possibly remember when Y.N hinted on the XXL site back in its halcyon days of 2006 (Bol and Noz posting everyday, Y.N himself comin' through with old KMD and Raekwon audio intervews, Sickamore being rechristened Yung Lipgloss after posting an extremely suspect picture of himself, DJ Drama gettin' run off the internet due to the torrent of abuse every post of his brought forth, the angry Bun B cameo in Bol's post about Pimp C etc etc) that there was gonna be a new Ego Trip's Book Of Rap List due in 2009 to celebrate the ten year anniversary of the first book on. So, ummm, yeah - what happened there then?

The Ego Trip book bodies "socio-political examinations of hip hop culture" like Can't Stop, Won't Stop because it concentrates on what's really important : rap music. The often amusing lists which make up 3/4 of the book provided the blueprint for what would make up the contents of rap message boards and blogs the past decade, but it's the lists of the best singles and albums from 1979 - 2008 in the last 1/4 of the book which elevate it to the bible of rap literature; they aren't always right because Don't Sweat The Technique, All We Got Iz Us and Street Gospel not making the album lists is some never-forgive action and there are numerous key omissions littered throughout the singles lists (Space Is The Place and Pack Jam by Jonzun Crew, Gettin' Money by Dr Jeckyll & Mr Hyde, Street Girl by Spoonie Gee, High Rollers and New Jack Hustler by Ice-T, I Shouldn't Have Done It and Sittin' In My Car by Slick Rick, What's On Your Mind by Eric B. & Rakim, Real Muthaphuckin' G's by Eazy-E, Toss It Up and Rakin' In The Dough by Zhigge, 4 Deep and Birds In The Kitchen by C-Bo, Check It Out remix by Grand Puba & Mary J. Blige, Pocket Full Of Stones remix and It's Supposed To Bubble by UGK, Rugged Neva Smoove by M.O.P, What Would U Do by Tha Dogg Pound, What's Going On, Black by Azie and Case Dismissed by Pretty Tone Capone, Comin' Out Hard and Listen To The Lyrics by 8Ball & MJG, Havin' Thangs by Big Mike ft. Pimp C, Sugarhill and Mo' Money, Mo' Murder "Homicide" by AZ, The Ghetto's Trying To Kill Me and I Miss My Homies by Master P, 1 Luv and Flashin' by E-40, Evil Streets by Onyx, Pimp Of The Year and Can You Feel Me? by Dru Down, Y'All Ain't Ready Yet and Here I Go by Mystikal, Firm Biz remix by The Firm with Half-A-Mill, On My Way and If U Stay Ready by Suga Free, Lookin' At Me by Ma$e, Luchini and Black Nostaljack by Camp Lo, Soulja Rag by Juvenile, How Ya Want It Native Tongues remix by Jungle Brothers et al, and Piece Of The Action by Godfather Don are some personal favourites conspicuous by their absence), but, fuck it, I can forgive them such transgressions since compiling the first 19 years of rap into list form must have been such a mammoth, brain-frying task.

So, since we aren't getting our promised new Ego Trip book I've had to nerd-out and come up with my own lists of singles for the past ten years. As this decade has progressed and we've seen formats like vinyl become near extinct it's become harder to define what actually constitutes a single nowadays, so here's my criteria : it must have come out as an actual single on 12"(or cd/tape) or/and have received video treatment. Like the Ego Trip book, I'm also considering b. sides on 12"s to count as singles and it's one song per artist a list unless they dropped something under a different moniker. Got it? We're good to go then :

1999

1. Pharoahe Monch - Simon Says
2. UGK - Wood Wheel
3. Lil' Wayne - Tha Block Is Hot/Juvenile - U Understand?
4. Mystikal ft. OutKast - Neck Uv Da Woods
5. Screwball - F.A.Y.B.A.N
6. Mobb Deep ft. Lil' Kim - Quiet Storm remix
7. Slick Rick ft. Big Boi - Street Talkin'
8. Dr Dre ft. Snoop, Kurupt & Nate Dogg - The Next Episode
9. Common ft. Sadat X - 1999
10. Bumpy Knuckles - A Part Of My Life
11. Gang Starr - Full Clip
12. Silkk The Shocker ft. Mystikal - It Ain't My Fault
13. Project Pat ft. Gangsta Boo - Ballers
14. Beatnuts - Watch Out Now
15. Young Bleed - Give And Take
16. Sir Menelik ft. Grand Puba & Sadat X - 7XL
17. O.D.B ft. Kelis - Got Your Money
18. Pastor Troy - No Mo' Play in G.A
19. The Clipse - The Funeral
20. R.A The Rugged Man - Stanley Kubrick

Since the Ego Trip book finished in '98 and '99 - '09 is a full decade we begin here. Nas Is Like? Pffft - you've come to the wrong blog if you expected that overrated clunker to be anywhere near this list. Simon Says is a bit of an obvious choice for # 1, but in this instance it just about seems the right one.

2000

1. M.O.P - Ante Up
2. Black Rob - Whoa
3. Ghostface & Raekwon - Apollo Kids
4. 8Ball & MJG - Pimp Hard
5. Prodigy - Keep It Thoro
6. Mystikal - Shake Ya Ass
7. Sadat X ft. Diamond D - X-Man
8. C-Murder ft. Magic & Snoop - Down For My N's
9. Beanie Sigel - The Truth
10. Three 6. Mafia ft. UGK - Sippin' On Some Syrup/Project Pat ft. La' Chat & DJ Paul - Chicken Head
11. Scarface - It Ain't Part II
12. OutKast - Ms. Jackson
13. Ruff Ryders ft. Snoop, Yung Wun, Scarface & Jadakiss - World War III
14. Shyne ft. Barrington Levy - Bad Boyz
15. Philly's Most Wanted - Suckas
16. CNN ft. Foxy Brown - Bang Bang
17. Jay-Z ft. Memphis Bleek & Beanie Sigel - Change The Game
18. Cormega - Take Mine
19. De La Soul ft. Redman - Oooh
20. Mac Dre - Off Tha Rictor

It seems a lifetime ago now when hardcore NY street records like Whoa, Bad Boyz, Keep It Thoro, and Ante Up could become these huge pop hits and radio mainstays, huh? Honourable mentions go to Boom by Royce Da 5'9" and Kryptonite by Big Scoob.

2001

1. OutKast ft. Sleepy Brown - So Fresh, So Clean
2. MF DOOM - I Hear Voices
3. Z-Ro ft. Trae - I Found Me
4. Beanie Sigel - Beanie (Mack Bitch)/State Property - Roc The Mic
5. Ghostface & Raekwon - The Watch
6. UGK ft. Devin The Dude - Ain't That A Bitch
7. G. Dep ft. Faith Evans - Everyday remix
8. Nate Dogg - I Got Love/Ludacris ft. Nate Dogg - Area Codes
9. Jadakiss ft. Styles P - We Gonna Make It
10. Mystikal - Bouncin' Back (Bumpin' Me Against The Wall)
11. M.O.P - Cold As Ice
12. Mobb Deep ft. Big Noyd & Vida - Burn
13. AZ - Problems
14. 8Ball & MJG ft. DJ Quik - Buck Bounce
15. Casual - Turkey And Dressing
16. Fabolous - Young'n (Holla Back)
17. Juvenile - Set It Off
18. Trick Daddy - I'm A Thug
19. Busta Rhymes - As I Come Back
20. Backbone - Five Duce Four Tre/Dungeon Family - Trans D.F Express

Despite the fact that most rap fans were enamoured with the beef between that dude who went on to pork Beyonce and that other dude who'd get fleeced by Kelis this year, there was so much better music elsewhere as this list proves. Takeover may have turned Prodigy into Harry Caul at the end of The Conversation, but make no mistake that Mobb's Burn bodied any single released in '01 by Jay-Z. Honourable mention go to Don't Say Shit To Ruck by Sean Price and Ugly by Bubba Sparxxx.

2002

1. The Diplomats & Master P - 'Bout It, 'Bout It Part 3
2. Nore - Nothin'
3. Nelly - Hot In Herre
4. Scarface - My Block
5. Trick Daddy ft. Cee-Lo & Big Boi - In Da Wind
6. The NYG'z - Giantz Ta This
7. Bubba Sparxxx - Lovely
8. E-40 ft. Fabolous - Automatic
9. AZ ft. Nas - The Essence/Nas - Made You Look
10. Devin The Dude - Lacville '79
11. Edan - Emcees Smoke Crack remix
12. OutKast ft. Killer Mike - The World World/Killer Mike - Akshon (Yeah!)
13. Grand Puba - Issues Pete Rock remix
14. Trina ft. Ludacris - B R Right
15. Big Noyd - Shoot 'Em Up (Bang Bang)
16. The Clipse - Grindin'
17. Styles P ft. Pharoahe Monch - The Life
18. Foxy Brown - Stylin'
19. 504 Boyz - Get Back
19. Tragedy Khadafi ft. Littles - Stay Free

Honourable mentions go to Move Bitch Ludacris ft. Mystikal & Infamous 2.0, Built For This by Cormega, Are We Cuttin'? by Pastor Troy ft. Ms Jade, From Tha Church To Tha Palace by Snoop, and Connected For Life Mack 10 ft. Ice Cube, Butch Cassidy & WC.

2003

1. The Dipset - Dipset Anthem
2. Ghostface ft. Jadakiss - Run
3. Baby ft. The Clipse - What Happened To That Boy?
4. Freeway ft. Jay Z & Beanie Sigel - What We Do
5. Three 6. Mafia ft. Lil' Flip - Ridin' Spinners
6. King Geedorah ft. Mr Fantastik - Anti-Matter
7. T.I - Rubberband Man
8. David Banner - Cadillac On 22s
9. OutKast - Ghetto Musick/Killer Mike ft. Big Boi - Adidas
10. E-40 ft. Turf Talk - Gasoline/The Federation ft. E-40 - Hyphy
11. Ludacris - Stand Up
12. Gang Starr ft. Jadakiss - Rite Where U Stand
13. Bubba Sparxxx - Jimmy Mathis
14. Blaq Poet - Poet's Comin'
15. Bonecrusher ft. Cam'ron, Jadakiss & Busta - Never Scared remix
16. Beanie Sigel ft. O.D.B & Peedi Crakk - When You Hear That
17. Juelz Santana - Dipset (Santana's Town)
18. Mobb Deep - Gangstaz Roll
19. Fabolous - Can't Let You Go remix
20. G-Unit - Stunt 101

See, I always think of 2000, 2002 and 2005 as being my favourite years this decade, but I look at this list and I'm like "Damn!" Stay Real by Black Moon, and Fall Back by Peedi Crakk & Freeway receive honourable mentions, although the video version of the latter sans Freeway which emerged a few years later was preferable to the original.

2004

1. Nas - Thief's Theme/AZ ft. Nas - Serious
2. Slim Thug - Like A Boss
3. Z-Ro ft. Scarface - These N*ggaz
4. Mac Dre - Feelin' Myself
5. Ghostface ft. Method Man, Streetlife & Trife - The Drummer/Cormega ft. Ghostface - Tony Montana
6. Lil' Wayne - Go D.J
7. MF DOOM - Hoe Cakes/Madvillain - All Caps
8. Devin The Dude - Right Now
9. Body Head Bangerz ft. Young Bleed & Lil' Boosie - I Smoke, I Drank
10. Keak Da Sneak ft. E-40 - White Tee, Blue Jeans & Nikes
11. Too $hort - Burn Rubber
12. KanYe West ft. Twista & Jamie Foxx - Slow Jamz/Twista ft. KanYe West - Overnight Celebrity
13. The Federation - Go Dumb
14. Slim Thug, Mike Jones & Chamillionaire - Still Tippin'
15. The Diplomats - Crunk Muzik
16. B.G - I Want It/Juvenile ft. UTP - Nolia Clap remix
17. Pete Rock ft. CL Smooth - Appreciate
18. 50 Cent - Ski Mask Way
19. Lil' Wyte ft. DJ Paul - Bye 2 Da Bad Guy
20. Common ft. KanYe West - The Food

For me this is the full stop on Nas's career because after Thief's Theme and his verses on AZ's Serious this retarded tin-eared cretin ceases to exist in my world. This is also the year when Texas and the Bay really started killin' it with banger after banger, and when Ca$h Money Records alumni thought possibly washed up on smack dropped three of the best singles of their career. Real Big by Mannie Fresh is an honourable mention alongside I Tried by Geto Boys, Lessons by R.A The Rugged Man, Drop It Like It's Hot by Snoop, Game Of Death by Roc Marciano, Game Over by Lil' Flip, and No Problem by Lil' Scrappy.

2005

1. Beanie Sigel - Feel It In The Air
2. Bun B ft. Pimp C, Z-Ro, Young Jeezy & Jay Z - Get Throwed
3. AZ - Never Change
4. Boyz 'N Da Hood - Dem Boyz/Young Jeezy ft. Jay-Z - Go Crazy remix
5. The Jacka - Barney (More Crime)
6. Sean Price - Onion Head
7. Cam'ron - Girls, Cash, Cars
8. Purple Ribbon Allstars - Kryptonite/Killer Mike ft. Big Boi - My Chrome
9. Z-Ro ft. Paul Wall & Lil' Flip - From The South
10. T.I - ASAP
11. M.O.P - Instigator
12. Ludacris - Number One Spot
13. Black Rob - Star In The Hood
14. Saigon ft. Kool G. Rap - The Letter P remix
15. O.D.B - Lift Ya Skirt
16. Mac Mall & Mac Dre ft. E-40 - Dredio/Mac Dre ft. Boss Hog, B-Luv & Husalah - Hustle
17. Common ft. KanYe West & The Last Poets - The Corner
18. Slim Thug ft. Young Jeezy, Killa & Slick Pulla Diamonds Mannie Fresh remix
19. Three 6 Mafia ft. Young Buck & 8Ball & MJG - Stay Fly
20. Juvenile - Get Ya Hustle On

Possibly my favourite year for singles this decade. Honourable mentions go to Super Sic Wid It by Mistah F.A.B ft. Turf Talk & E-40, Sittin' Sidewayz by Paul Wall ft. Big Pokey, Rumors by Maino, Drive Slow by KanYe et al, Mic Check by Juelz Santana, Window Shopper by 50 Cent, Hate It Or Love It by Game ft. 50 Cent, Gotcha by Camp Lo & Tyler Woods, Got Dat Drank by Frayser Boy ft. Mike Jones & Paul Wall, and Gilla House Check by Redman.

2006

1. Trae ft. Z-Ro - No Help
2. Prodigy - Mac Ten Handle/Mobb Deep - Put 'Em In Their Place
3. Young Bleed - Put Your Stamp On It
4. UGK - Game Belongs To Me
5. OutKast - The Mighty "O"
6. AZ ft. M.O.P - Sit 'Em Back Slow
7. Tha Dogg Pound & Snoop - Cali Iz Active
8. E-40 ft. Keak Da Sneak - Tell Me When To Go
9. Ghostface - The Champ
10. 8Ball & MJG ft. Project Pat - Relax And Take Notes
11. Byrd Gang - Life's Like A Movie/Agallah - Club Hoppin'
12. T.I ft. UGK - Front Back/Young Dro ft. T.I - Shoulder Lean
13. Young Jeezy - Bury Me A G
14. D. Block - Take Everything You Got
15. Trap Squad ft. Fabo - What's Happenin'/D4L - Betcha Can't Do It Like Me
16. Bubba Sparxxx ft. Killer Mike & Cool Breeze - Claremont Lounge
17. Too $hort - Blow The Whistle
18. Curtains - That's What It Is
19. The Pack - Vans
20. Lil' Boosie ft. Webbie - I Represent

The last year in this list where near enough every single came out as a 12", bar the Young Bleed and Prodigy tunes which were released as internet videos. The Prodigy clip pretty much saved his career after the G. Unit dickriding, but I really liked Put 'Em In Their Place too even if nobody else did. The Pharcyde and Y'All So Stupid had been seen sporting various Sk8 His and Eras on LP sleeves in the 90s, but nobody foresaw a group of young upstarts from the Bay droppin' rap's first musical ode to the footwear of one Paul Van Doren.

2007

1. Lil' Boosie - Fresh Cut/Foxx ft. Lil' Boosie & Webbie - Wipe Me Down remix
2. Cam'ron - Wet Wipes/Max B - Why You Do That
3. UGK ft. OutKast - Int'l Players Anthem
4. Prodigy - Return Of The Mac
5. KanYe West - Can't Tell Me Nothing
6. Devin The Dude ft. Snoop & Andre 3000 - What A Job
7. Camp Lo - Material
8. DJ Jazzy Jeff & Peedi Crakk - Brand New Funk 2k7
9. Styles P ft. AZ - The Hardest
10. Ghostface ft. Styles P, Beanie Sigel, & Solomon Childs - Barrel Brothers
11. Huey ft. Bow Wow & T-Pain - Pop, Lock And Drop It remix
12. Byrd Gang - Sour Diesel
13. Rich Boy - Boy Looka Here/B.O.B ft. Rich Boy - Haterz Everywhere
14. Dude N Nem - Watch My Feet
15. Crime Mob - Circles
16. Rhymefest ft. Lil' Jon - Angry Black Man On An Elevator
17. Common ft. DJ Premier - The Game
18. G-Side - I Feel Like I Look
19. Wu-Tang Clan - Take It Back
20. Shawty Lo - Dey Know

Usually, these single lists give a good indication of my listening habits per year, but that wasn't the case in '07. Freeway and Scarface both released great albums with dud singles, and nary a single was plucked from my 2 favourite albums of '07 - Turf Talk's West Coast Vaccine and Husalah's Huslin' Since Da 80's. Still, it seems churlish to whine about such minor trivialties in the year which gave us that top 13 and a fair portion of the list on crisp black wax 12" singles as the format was dying on its arse.

2008

1. Trae ft. Slim Thug - Nuthin' 2 A Boss
2. Blaq Poet - Don't Give A Fucc
3. Pete Rock ft. Jim Jones & Max B - We Roll/Max B - Picture Me Rollin'
4. Hot Stylz ft. Yung Joc - Lookin' Boy
5. AZ ft. Styles P - The Hardest Part 2
6. E-40 ft Ice-T - Earl
7. Lil' Wayne - A Milli
8. Consequence ft. KanYe West - The Good, The Bad, The Ugly
9. All $tar - Alphabet Soup
10. Big Boi ft. Raekwon & Andre 3000 - Royal Flush
11. Curren$y - The Reagan Era
12. Prodigy - Dirty New Yorker
13. Young Jeezy - Crazy World
14. T.I - What Up, What's Happenin'
15. Lil' Will ft. Soulja Boy - My Dougie
16. Jackie Chain ft. Jhi Ali - Rollin'
17. Jadakiss - Welcome To The Roc
18. Busta Rhymes - Don't Touch Me (Throw Da Water On 'Em)
19. Laroo & The Jacka - 20 Bricks
20. Maino - Hi Hater

A few of these became official singles long after they dropped (The Good, The Bad, The Ugly, We Roll and Nuthin' 2 A Boss), and it's a good thing they did because great singles weren't exactly overflowing in 2008. Can't complain about the singles released this year, though, (especially that top 10) and every tune other thsn Royal Flush and We Roll were afforded a video. As much as I love the format of the 12" single, at this point i'll take a video on Youtube or WSHH over a piece of wax in a plain cardboard sleeve which I'm running out of room to store.

2009

1. Lil' Boosie - Mind Of A Maniac
2. DJ Quik & Kurupt - 9 Times Outta 10
3. DOOM - Gazzillion Ear
4. Curren$y - Elevator Musik
5. Raekwon ft. Method Man & Ghostface - New Wu
6. Big Boi ft. Gucci Mane - Shine Blockas/Gucci Mane - Lemonade
7. Young Chris & Freeway ft. Beanie Sigel - Last 2/Beanie Sigel - The Ghetto
8. Cam'Ron - I Used To Get It In Ohio
9. G. Mane ft. G-Side - No One Duz It Betta/G-Side ft. P.T - My Aura
10. UGK - Da Game Been Good To Me
11. Lil B - I'm God
12. A-Wax & Gonzoe ft. C-Murder - Natural Disasterz
13. Young Jeezy - Circulate
14. De La Soul - Excursions '09
15. Jacka & Berner ft. Fed-X & Lee Majors - Traffickin'
16. Tha Dogg Pound ft. Turf Talk - Y'All Know What I'm Doin'
17. Royce Da 5'9" - Shake This
18. Rich Boy - Drop
19. Witchdoctor - Rich And Poor
20. Treal Lee & Prince Rick ft. Wideframe - Mr Hit Dat Hoe

All of these got the video treatment, bar De La's Excursions remake that appeared on an 12" EP of the best tunes from that J. Period tribute to Q. Tip/ATCQ mixtape, which is a nice way to end the decade.

*EDIT* And on we go :

2010

1. Max B - Where Do I Go?
2. Lil' Boosie - Top To The Bottom
3. Gucci Mane - Normal/Waka Flocka Flame - Hard In Da Paint
4. AZ - Feel My Pain
5. Young Jeezy ft. Yo Gotti - All White Everything remix
6. Lil B - Good Morning/Soulja Boy ft. Lil B - 30 Thousand, 100 Million
7. Yelawolf - Pop The Trunk
8. $tarlito - What Was I Thinking?
9. E-40 - Undastandz Me
10. Raekwon - Canal Street
11. Big K.R.I.T ft. Killa Kyleon & Curren$y - Moon & Stars remix
12. CNN ft. Imam Thug & MussoliNY - Thug Planet/N.O.R.E - Nutcracker
13. Dru Down ft. The Jacka - Hello, Hello, Hello
14. Eddi Projex & Beeda Weeda - Gettin' G's
15. Danny Brown - Re-Up
16. B.o.B ft. T.I & Playboy Tre - Bet I Bust
17. Curren$y - Life Under The Scope/Curren$y & Fiend - Flying Iron
18. Max Minelli - Louisiana Sky
19. Zed Zilla - I'm Da Boss
20. Big Boi ft. Cutty - Shutterbugg

Honourable mentions go to 1000 Grams by A-Mafia, Make It Rain by Travis Porter, Slidin' by NhT Boyz, Heart And Soul by Red Cafe with Pete Rock, AND EARL by Earl Sweatshirt

2011

1. Waka Flocka Flame ft. Kebo Gotti - Grove St. Party
2. DB Tha General - Upgrade 'Em 2
3. Gunplay ft. Waka Flocka Flame - Rollin'
4. Slim Dunkin - I Gotta Eat/Waka Flocka Flame & Slim Dunkin - Twin Towers 2 Intro
5. AZ - The Calm
6. Meek Mill ft. Rick Ross - Tupac Back
7. E-40 - Concrete
8. Webbie ft. Lil' Phat - What's Happenin'
9. DJ Quik ft. Gift Reynolds - Luv Of My Life
10. Soulja Boy - Zan With That Lean Part 2
11. French Montana ft. Charlie Rock - Shot Caller/Chinx Drugz - Superlight
12. King Louie - Man Up Band Up remix (Get Money)
13. Young Bleed - Holla At Uh Dog
14. Riff Raff SODMG & TKO Capone - Cocky Bastard
15. A-Mafia ft. 2 Chainz - Real Live Pro remix
16. Lady - Yankin'
17. N.O.R.E - NORE Shot Somebody
18. Jackie Chain ft. Bun B - Parked Outside
19. Foxx - Stressed Out
20. Yo Gotti ft. Stuey Rock - Single

Honourable mentions go to Life by $tarlito & Don Trip, Safe Sex by Bo Deal ft. Mellow G. Blanca, Swagger Fresh Freddie by Mouse On Tha Track, What Yo Name Iz by Kirko Bangz, Louis Gucci by TKO Capone, and Larry Bird by Riff Raff SODMG.

2012

1. Gunplay - Jump Out
2. Chinx Drugz ft. French Montana - I'm A Coke Boy
3. Alpoko Don - Get My Paypa, Dog
4. Rick Ross - High Definition
5. Fam-Lay - Clap Clap
6. Juicy J - Bands A Make Her Dance/DJ Paul - Cocky
7. DB Tha General - Don't Worry
8. Clyde Carson ft. The Team - Slow Down
9. Mic Terror - Rodney King
10. King Louie - Bars
11. Lady - Pussy
12. TY$ & Joe Mo$e$ - Weekend/TY$ - My Cabana
13. Nicki Minaj ft. 2 Chainz - Beez In The Trap
14. A-Mafia - Story Of My Life
15. Foxx - I Wonder
16. N.O.R.E - Kenny Powers
17. Young Giftz ft. TREE - Nino
18. IamSu! - Two Eleven/LoveRance ft. 50 Cent, IamSu! & Skipper - UP! remix
19. Rich Kidz - Kool On The Low
20. Treal Lee & Prince Rick ft. Ace Hood - Transform

Honourable mentions go to I Got Dat Sack by Yo Gotti, and Time by RiFF RaFF.

2013

1. YG ft. Rich Homie Quan & Young Jeezy - My N*gga
2. Gunplay - Drop Da Tint
3. Mouse On Tha Track ft. Level - Get It Back
4. Rich Homie Quan - Differences
5. AZ - We Movin'
6. Lil' Wayne ft. 2 Chainz - Rich As Fuck
7. Young Jeezy ft. 2 Chainz - R.I.P
8. DB Tha General - Turnt Out
9. ZMoney - Regular
10. Johnny Cinco - They Gave The Wrong Young N*gga Money
11. Uncle Murda ft. Rocko - Wu Wuu Wuuu
12. Rocko ft. Future & Rick Ross - U.O.E.N.O
13. Future - Shit
14. Kevin Gates - Neon Lights
15. Lil' Durk - 52 Bars Part 2
16. Young Dro - FDB
17. HD Of Bearfaced - No Pretendo
18. Boldy James - Moochie
19. KanYe West ft. Charlie Wilson - Bound 2
20. Racked Up Ready ft. DJ B-Real & Mista Cain - Mind Right

Honourable mention goes to How Can I Lose? by Chinx Drugz.